Victor: Do you listen to all the experts on podcasts and think, "no wonder they're experts. They're awesome. They're smart. They're..." -- stop right there! You're awesome. You have a story to tell, and there really is no one like you. Fellow normal humans Dalia Ramahi and Jordan Drayer share what they've learned in hopes of inspiring you to find your unique voice. This is the Blooming Voices Podcast. Go to bloomingvoices.com for more information. Now let's get to it.
Dalia: Hi everyone. Welcome to another episode of the Blooming Voices Podcast. I'm Dalia Ramahi.
Jordan: Jordan Drayer. And it's really nice to see you guys or hear you guys.
Dalia: Yes. Thank you for joining us. Today we are going to talk about honoring our truths and following our intuition and our inner guidance system.
Jordan: Not --
Dalia: What feels right.
Jordan: -- being afraid of how it looks to other people. This is something I struggle with. Always wondering like, okay, what do they see? What do they think? But I know like in the end, like from myself scrolling on Facebook, oh -- like no one cares except your really close family or people really in your life.
Dalia: And that's true about almost everything on social media. Like who are the people that care most about your travel pictures, your food pictures, all that other stuff? You know what I -- we make ourselves bigger than -- and I don't mean that in like a negative way --
Jordan: Yeah.
Dalia: -- but we think things are bigger, we make things bigger in our own minds than they actually are because most people just keep scrolling past like, oh, okay. And they don't even think twice about when they like, or not like something, you know what I mean?
Jordan: Yeah. Like it's good, of course, to share your story. That's the point of the podcast, to share your pictures and stuff.
Dalia: Yes. Exactly.
Jordan: And maybe someone looking will be like, oh, Greece. I want to go there too! And you just helped --
Dalia: Exactly.
Jordan: -- someone determine their vacation spot.
Dalia: Yeah. But what we're talking about is overthinking social media, you know, and, um, you know, allowing that to then start dictating or influencing how you think about yourself, how you see yourself, and the decisions you make for your life, because you think somehow you don't measure up to everybody else because they're all do -- they're all doing these crazy, amazing things and you're lost or you're fallen behind, or so you, you might tend to make decisions that don't feel right because of some outer influence. Do you know what I mean?
Jordan: Like fear or another person. Yeah.
Dalia: Yeah.
And, um, I think you have any example of that for us, right? Would you like to share your story? Go ahead.
Jordan: After months of thinking about it and even going through the motions of getting the visa and stuff, I've decided I don't want to go to France.
Dalia: Yeah. Can you give the listeners who may not have followed other episodes a little background of what you mean by that?
Jordan: Yeah. So I, I did go to France last year with the TAPIF program, which is like October 1st to April 30th. And you can do it at least twice. And so I had been planning this whole time because you renew in January, February. Uh, back then I said, I want to renew because I want to see what, what it's like to really stay here, what it's like to really teach, and to determine do I really want to teach and do this kind of career change from that -- I mean, from focusing on voiceover as a career to teaching instead? And being back this summer with my friends and I don't know, I just don't want to leave again. And I haven't really been in Los Angeles that long anyway. So I still have a lot of work to do in entrenching myself here and making the community that I want. That's more important to me than anything right now is just having friends that I can rely on and a community and even like favorite restaurants and stuff. I still don't really have a favorite restaurant in Los Angeles because I haven't gone out enough. So yeah, just battling back and forth. Uh, I've decided in the last few days, I don't want to go. I'm going to break the contract, and there's a long wait list, and someone else will be happy to be taken off. And like, it made me, 'cause I thought about it like for several weeks, what if I do this? But I finally admitted it out loud recently. And uh, I was like, I'm going to look like a failure. I'm going to look like someone who can't keep her word. And, uh, I don't know. So I was afraid of how others would see me.
Dalia: And there it is. Right? So you're afraid of how others might see you, and you tortured yourself all summer long with this decision.
Jordan: Yeah.
Dalia: Um, and now how do you feel now that you've made it, now that you finally decided you'll really?
Jordan: I feel relieved.
Dalia: Yeah.
Jordan: And it's just nice, 'cause it's a lot of stress, yeah. Like, 'cause this time I was going to sell a bunch of furniture and even take a cat with me, but like a lot of my life there in France, when I wasn't at school was boring and lonely because of the virus. That's, yeah, that's one factor.
Dalia: Yeah.
Jordan: But also like, I don't know. I didn't know --
Dalia: Starting over is hard. Yeah.
Jordan: Yeah.
Dalia: Especially in a new country.
Jordan: Yeah. And so it's like, if -- do I really want to start over and make a new web of friends over there? And that would mean staying to even get the front. 'Cause it takes me, I guess, as a twin, like a long time to really consider someone, uh, as a friend, even if I do stuff with them.
Dalia: So time out there because that's the key. So there it is. Um, you know, starting over for some people feels good, right? They can do it easily, make friends easily, but not everybody is wired the same way. Some people, it takes longer to adjust or to connect with others or whatever. Right? And that's kind of where you're going with it. I'm the same way. Maybe it is a twin thing, but I know that there are a lot of people who, you know, need time to warm up to others and to create a tribe of their own, especially in a new place. So that's what -- you feel, I think is totally normal.
Jordan: And like if I go back again, we still have the virus, and it's kind of in the same place as it was last year. It might even be worse, and so I might experience just more of the same and it's not all travel. It's just, it is daily living, just in another country.
Dalia: Yeah. I think the most important thing here is clarity. When you find clarity in what you want, you can pursue it much more easily, but as long as you have all these, um, competing thoughts in your own mind, it makes making decisions -- it makes pursuing your dreams or your desires a much more difficult. Right? So you got clear on what you really wanted, which is to really focus on creating your friend network, your tribe, your support system in LA, and really focusing in on your voiceover career, right?
Jordan: Yeah. Because yeah. I have put it on hold for a bit. And even when in 2013, when I was first learning about voiceover, and I had just graduated FSU, I was like, what do I do?
Dalia: Oh wait, that's funny because in 2013 is when I started too, ha!
Jordan: Oh.
Dalia: When I first started, when I first started learning about it. That's great. Okay. And you fact-learned about us!
Jordan: Yeah, but like, 'cause when I got out of FSU, I was like really floundering because I was no longer going to be the professional musician that I said that I would. And so I was like, what do I do now? And I had always wanted to learn about voiceover since middle school, but I was like, well, I could be in the army and do that and then do voiceover. And then at some point in the summer, I was like, no, why do the army? I can do voiceover now, because like the army wasn't repaying student loans anymore anyway. So that was like, that was the main draw for that for me.
Dalia: I think that is for a lot of people. And I mean, it's a big draw. So. Um, you know what, pursuing voiceover, you know, and this is really good for our listeners to keep in mind as well -- sometimes you have that thing deep inside you that you just constantly think about. And you push it aside because you don't feel like it's realistic, it's attainable. Other people tell you it's silly, whatever it is, but you keep coming back to it in some form or another. Your mind keeps coming back to it. I genuinely believe that those are callings that we have, and we need to honor them. Like our soul is trying to tell us something. It might not be that you'll be a voice actor forever or an artist or whatever it is, but that you need to explore this route in order to honor yourself. You know what I mean?
Jordan: Yeah, yeah, I --
Dalia: I genuinely believe that, but we need clarity. And the only way we can get clarity is when we learn to put all those other voices of other people saying, that's not realistic or that's, or that's stupid or whatever it is, we just detach ourselves from that, you know?
Jordan: Yeah. Like, 'cause I let music take me as far as it did, like from middle school through university. And it was not a mistake. We've talked about that before.
Dalia: Yeah.
Jordan: Because it was what I needed at the time.
Dalia: Exactly.
Jordan: And music is still useful in acting as well. So maybe I'll let acting take me as far as -- I haven't really given it a chance.
Dalia: Exactly. Go all in and see where it takes you.
Jordan: Yeah. And then maybe I'll end up as a firefighter, who knows, like it could be something really weird.
Dalia: So I know I may have said this before on the podcast. I know I've had that pleasure and the honor of getting to speak in front of a couple audiences before COVID and on Zoom. And I shared this part about my life. I found myself in the position of a teacher, of being a teacher so many times throughout my adult life. Okay? And I never wanted to be a teacher. It's not something I studied in school. I don't have a degree in teaching or education. Um, but I found myself in teaching roles. Right? And uh, every time I told myself, I can't teach, what do I have to teach? What do I have to offer? But then when I got in front of the group that I was teaching or the person or whatever it was, guiding, I don't know, I always felt connected. I felt electric.
It felt good. You know what I mean?
And um, I found that as an inadvertent calling, like through my voiceover, through my corporate life, through running businesses, I found that I was always placed in these teaching roles. And instead of resisting it, which I did at the beginning, I just allowed myself to see where it took me. And it's taken me to so many incredible places in my life and allowed me to learn so much. So even though like I don't see myself standing in front of a classroom full of kids, that opportunity keeps coming back and that pattern keeps repeating itself. And so instead of resisting it, I say, okay, I am someone that may have something to teach another person. So when these opportunity arises, I explore that. So if you find that you're in a similar situation with whatever it is in your life, instead of constantly shutting the door, explore it. Allow yourself to explore whatever comes to you. You know?
Jordan: Yeah. I too have had these, well, I mean, because -- teaching moments that keep returning and stuff, so maybe that will be more important in the future. But it is always voiceover that's in the back of my head, and I still want to do so many things in Los Angeles, like take a commercial acting class. Maybe even try on camera acting, go back to Central Casting and do the extras work.
Dalia: That's what I did here. Exactly. And, you know, um, like during the pandemic I started doing on-camera acting, and I just did it just to learn about it. You know what I mean? And I just thought it might make me a more well-rounded voice actor.
Jordan: Yeah, yeah.
Dalia: But I found I loved it! So then I started doing Zoom plays, um, during the pandemic. And now that we're back to in-person classes, I'm doing in-person acting classes, you know what I mean?
Jordan: Oh, that's nice. Yeah, that's what I was told to do.
Dalia: And it's been fun. It's been so fun to explore, and through it, um, I learned even more about myself, but I wouldn't have done that if I didn't allow myself to be curious about it.
Jordan: Yeah.
Dalia: Do you know what I mean?
Jordan: Yeah.
Dalia: Like if I had said no, I'm not an an on-camera actor. That's, I'd -- that'd be silly for me to do. I'm just going to focus on voice acting. No, there is an impulse that led me to say, I'm going to go take an on-camera acting class. I'm going to go learn about, um, commercials. I'm going to learn about this stuff. And then through that, I realized I actually loved it. And then that gave me the courage to act in plays, which I didn't think about at the start of Covid. You know what I mean? Um, so you never know where you end up when you just allow yourself to explore your opportunities or your curiosity at least.
Jordan: Yeah. So like in talking about exploring our curiosities and the urges inside, this is me, me staying, this is me exploring. This is me saying yes to Los Angeles. And in a way it seems harder because now my life is, uh, less certain, because before, at least for the next eight months, I knew I'd be in France with this job. And now here I am still in Los Angeles. What am I going to do now? Like now I don't know anything, but it's worth exploring.
Dalia: Yes, because you said yes to what you really want. And now you're going to go for it wholeheartedly. Right? There you go. Congratulations, Jordan, I'm excited for you.
Jordan: And yeah, it'll make the family stuff and staying in touch that kind of easier and whatever. And I can always travel. I can always go back one day or meet like a husband that gives me money so I can travel.
Dalia: Or girl you'll have your own money and you and him will travel all over because you'll be successful actress, voice actress, anything you want. Right?
Jordan: Exactly. All right. So --
Dalia: Or wife or whatever else you want to be.
Jordan: Well, yeah, like hopefully it's my money.
Dalia: Yeah.
Jordan: But yeah. So saying yes, I guess not being afraid of what other people think or are going to say, because you broke a contract, you went back on your word. Like, I guess this makes me normal because so many other people go back on their word all the time.
Dalia: Yeah, and who cares if a hundred people go back on their word? It's -- you're not going back on your word just for the sake of going back on it. What you're doing is honoring yourself because you didn't really know what it is that you wanted, even though deep down you did, but you were kind of just going through the motions to try to find something else. And that's the takeaway here, guys, is that allow yourself to just be. Go with the flow. And I'm not talking about in that laid back, lazy river on a like a tube kind of thing. Well, although that's really nice, but just when you hear that inner voice, allow yourself to listen to it and see what it's really telling you. And if you find yourself constantly going back and forth, why? Right? So free yourself from that kind of stress, I guess.
Jordan: Yes. And with that, I want to say thank you for listening.
Dalia: Yes.
Jordan: And you can find us on Twitter and Instagram and email. Please let us know what you think. Or if you've struggled with something like this, or I don't know, if this inspired you somehow --
Dalia: Share, comment. Just let us know. We'd love to hear from you all. So the website is bloomingvoices.com.
Jordan: And the Email is bloomingvoicespodcast@gmail.com.
Dalia: Yeah. We'd love to hear from you. Thank you for tuning in, everyone!
Jordan: Thank you. Bye!
Victor: That's our show. Didn't get enough of the twins? Go to BloomingVoices.com for more information and let us know what you thought of the episode. Twitter, Instagram, email, we've got the works. We'll see you next Wednesday.
